Social Anxiety Blogs

Let me try this again, seeing I lost my last entry, I hate it when that happens.

I've been seeing my therapist, I need to, I need more than just the drugs, I can see where my attitude gets negative when I don't. I will blame myself for everything, everything. We just had a long talk, basically she said what my Mom and Becky said, still;-) I need to keep things in perspective. I need to know how I feel when I feel it, too me, a spade is a spade, we can't change things (black and white thinking) yet, things that sometimes effect us, there's more to it than meets the eye, I'm suppose to be figuring out why phone calls and such are so upsetting.
She helped me (Lisa) why "his" gfs tude was so bothersome too me.

I faxed all info to the Military, this will be fun, it's starting to effect my daughter. You know, when I was going over this with Lisa she said hey, if they don't take you off, you should be getting some back pension not.........I agree and I will go for it, this is so asinine.

A lawyer said that "Felon" may have been trying to set me up, I had never thought of that, he said "Not if he breaks the law again, but when" isn't that terrible, to think so little of someone, but they're doing it to themselves. Anyway, again, I never would have thought this, I'm glad I no longer have any keys.

My daughter really likes this school, she's terribly shy I know she would adjust, I just would like to stay in an area she is familiar with (who am I.......) yet........I have the most affordable housing in this area. I can't go East, South it gets pretty expensive (while in the school district) and God, don't let me go right into the town, they're all Republicans, Gov Engler....God no......I never.... Just an expensive area. Who wants to help me move this summer?

Just because one has cookies in the house, doesn't mean you have to eat them all, I dislike the new Super Walmart, but they have some great pastries.

I broke a tie rod on my van, remember it's an older van with a much newer engine. Long story shorter, I was on the phone, they were telling me how much EVERYTHING would be, I just asked them to scale it down, my call waiting kept going off, I'm thinking Mom give me a break. I finally got off, she calls instantly She goes on "I talked to your mechanic, I know how much it will cost" Mom just loan me 50.00 please so I can......She interupptes me, she already talked to them about this "It will only last a couple months" she loaned me close to 800 to fix the tie rods, ball joints, you name it, a lot of money for an old van, but, her engine is awesome, I can still go from 0-55 in a heartbeat. Just the thought sickens me. I will probably get another car next year, but I don't want payments, this is the first time in my life I haven't had one, and it's nice. I don't know....Everything is changing.

Oh, oh, oh! I didn't even mention this to my friends. The job I interviewed for, never, I knew it was too much responsiblity going off like I was, supervision of 6-8 people, 40 hours a week, if someone doesn't show up, "we" were to call someone else in........Which then they would be making more then me, the job paid between 9-11 an hour, college town but Jesus christ, a lot of responsiblity for that amount of money, more than I have now, BUT......Common I was making more than that 14 years ago, another life time.

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