Social Anxiety Blogs

Hello. I am pretty new to this whole blog thing, but I need to get some help and I need to talk to someone that doesn't know me. I don't feel that my anxiety completely over rules my life to the point that I need to be medicated for it, because overall I think I have done a pretty good job at confronting my fears over the past couple of years.I understand that most of my fears are in my head and that I can't let these things get the best of me. There are still certain situations that are just too overwhelming and I can't seem to get over it.
I just moved to a small town, I started a new school and a new job. My anxiety of going to school was short lived and I was able to overcome it by sitting next to the same people and forcing myself to talk and make friends. My new job on the other hand has proven most difficult and it's making me sick.
I only work one or two nights a week and I have made it that way to ovoid having to go in as much as I possibly can. I am a server.. a job that is probably the most social of them all. I have a problem with the people I work with... not the people that I serve. I do okay with strangers because I know that I will most likely never have to see them again. The people i work with are nice to some point they are very gossipy and I have a hard time trying to trust them so I keep to myself. They have all known each other for sometime and are pretty close. I am the new person in town and in result of that I am pretty much on my own, which makes me feel like a main target for gossip. But who cares what other people think of me right?? It's easier said then done. I get so nervous before I go to work. My heart starts beating like crazy I get butterflies in my stomach and it doesn't get any better when I am there I can't talk to my co workers because I screw up my words and I can't think of anything to say to them so that I could get to know them and be comfortable around them. I start feeling miserable before I have to go to work, while I am there, and after I come home. While I am there I feel that I come off as some weired crazy bitch.. What can I do to make this better? I don't feel that quiting my job and finding a new one would be a good idea, because I would find myself in the same situation somewhere else! What can I do besides taking medication to help me overcome this? So that I can continue to work and be happy while I am there?

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