I am facing a situation right now and honestly it is starting to greatly interfere with my ability to deal with the general anxiety and social phobia I have been dealing with all my life. I returned home as an adult after a failed attempt to be on his own to seek an official diagnosis so he can begin treatment.
But once there my emmediately begin pigeon holing me;after the diagnosis every single little step the I took became related to "social anxiety" in some way. I am unable to work or be in large groups;I don't have many friends and have to deal with the family a lot.And what they are doing is not helpful in my recovery.They even go as far as trying to get my therapist to see only THEIR side of the story.
My father has always had a bad relationship with the me.I love him very much and want to be able to have that positive relationship with him,but he doesn’t listen to what I have to say to him and never wants to be responsible for his own actions. Not only that but he likes to control what I say as well,to the point of micromanaging the same situation with my mother This has resulted in me having a dysfunctional personality OUTSIDE the social anxiety but my father will not accept that and wants to make it all my problem.
My mother meanwhile is crestfallen, desperate.She wants to help the me but really doesn’t know what to do. She also has a very difficult time accepting that the father may be a part of the problem because of his poor listening skills. In the end,while attempting to keep up with therapy and move forward in life I'm constantly haunted with the dysfunctional relationship with my father;it has become part of me and I noticed after a time I was beginning to develope personality traits similar to my father.
Still all my family sees, or chooses to see in me as nothing more then "social anxiety";I AM is the entire problem or rather my"disorder" and nothing they’ve done has had a negative impact. I have to stay with the parents and wants to because I loves them, need and want their help and support. But it’s hard for the parents because while I'm forced to have to come to an awakening about my problems the parents, especially the father refuse to admit they are anything but blameless, pure victims.
This is one of my main goals I have come to a realization about in therapy;that a lot of my issues have been compounded by my fathers stubborn refusal to work as hard as I to help improve the relationship. It's lead to a lot of fights between us and impeded my ability to get the therapy I need for myself. I often find myself wondering if there's anybody out their who can relate to the same things I am going through.

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