Social Anxiety Blogs

I am somewhat of a normal functioning SA sufferer. I can leave the house, talk on the phone, and engage in small talk better than it seems some of my co-workers...I work in radio so I could not have gotten this far if I was as bad as some SA sufferers. However, if you wanted to make a seperate diagonsis for Avoidant Personality Disorder, this describes me to a tee. I feel special in a strange way they have a disorder especially for me.

1. Avoids occupational activities that involve significant interpersonal contact, because of fears of criticism, disapproval, or rejection
2. Is unwilling to get involved with people unless certain of being liked
3. Shows restraint initiating intimate relationships because of the fear of being shamed, ridiculed, or rejected due to severe low self-worth.
4. Is preoccupied with being criticized or rejected in social situations
5. Is inhibited in new interpersonal situations because of feelings of inadequacy
6. Views self as socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others
7. Is unusually reluctant to take personal risks or to engage in any new activities because they may prove embarrassing

I am a loner because of this. Obviously I have had to overcome some of this to get to where I am at. But my life could have been so much richer to this point if I had not been plagued by those descriptions. When I start using alcohol and the occasional joint in high school, I felt for the first time I was accepted...in fact people liked me when I was drunk, I was a good time to be around. I flirted with women and I made a bunch of new friends. However these new friends came with my "drunk persona" and all these years later, and especially now since I have swore off ever getting drunk again, those folks aren't really my friends anymore. Afterall what do we have in common?

Still, this is a "war" and I'm not giving up.

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